The Ultimate Truth or Dare Challenge
by livingondaydreams
Summary: When HephaestusTV's ratings plummet, it needs a new show fast. What do they come up with? The Ultimate Truth or Dare Challenge. The hitch? The demigods don't know it's a game.  Temporarily abandoned story.  R&R
1. Prologue

**A/N: Truth or Dare, epic edition. I suppose you could call it a parody of all the T/D fics out there - this is certainly not an actual story in any way. Yes, there's a plot, and yes, it's more than just questions and answers, but this is not to be taken seriously in any way. Reviews and suggestions are always appreciated!  
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><p><strong>The Ultimate Truth or Dare Challenge<strong>

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><p><strong>Prologue<strong>

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><p>V75T the automaton scurried around the headquarters of HephaestusTV anxiously, looking for Hephaestus. The bi-monthly viewing report had just come in, and things were looking bleak.<p>

Finally, he found the smith god working at a tool bench in his forge on Olympus.

"Lord Hephaestus," V75T said in his robotic voice. "The numbers for the last two weeks are done."

"Well?" Hephaestus asked gruffly. "How are they?"

V75T's circuits began to reach unhealthy temperature levels. He was never good under pressure.

"They are… not good, my lord. Our ratings have decreased ten percent."

The god cursed. "Hermes and his internet… What are people saying, V75T?"

The poor automaton stuttered until Hephaestus got up and rearranged his speech wires. "Thank you, my lord. We are losing people because of the lack of new shows, predominantly."

"What, they expect us to invent something one week after a war?" He snorted and stroked his flaming beard thoughtfully. If he did a new show, it would have to be a cookie-cutter reality series, but entertaining at the same time; there was no way he could pull together writers, actors, producers... He shuddered just thinking of it. Meetings were heinously boring - he was a _mechanic_, not an _executive_. He shook his head. What hadn't they done before? Olympian Spin the Bottle had been a hit, and spying on the demigods was always fun... He grinned. Bingo. "Fine. They want originality? We'll give them something original, all right."

He limped over to his bench and began working away at something furiously.

"My—my lord?" asked V75T.

"We're going to have a challenge," he said, eyes glinting mischievously. "A challenge for the demigods."


	2. We See the Light

**A/N: Hope you all like this! It might take me a while to update, because I still have to finish writing Round 1. Feel free to suggest truths or dares. Just for the record, there will be no declarations of undying love. Sorry, but it's just not gonna happen. Enjoy, and please leave your thoughts in a review!**

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><p><strong>The Ultimate Truth or Dare Challenge<strong>

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><p><strong>We See the Light<strong>

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><p>It was a normal day at camp. The Apollo cabin was shooting flaming arrows in the archery range, Peleus the dragon was making smoke circles by Thalia's pine, the Hephaestus campers were creating deadly weapons in the forges, and the Aphrodite kids were running after some Hermes guys trying to give them makeovers.<p>

Meanwhile, the head counselors were gathered in the Big House, talking about normal camp problems, like the recent lava flood at the climbing wall and yesterday's Laistrygonian uprising up in Quebec.

"You know," commented Connor, "Camp is kinda boring recently. Travis, we should prank someone soon." His older brother grinned and they fistbumped.

Will Solace, the head counselor of the Apollo cabin, rolled his eyes. "As long as it's not my cabin, I don't care what you two do. We had enough trouble with that stupid chariot."

"Oh, sure," Clarisse snorted. "Now you think it's stupid. That's only because you gave it up, punk."

"Yeah, we gave it up because _you_ were being a—"

Katie cleared her throat. "Language, Will."

"Aw, come on, Katie," Nico groaned. "They were about to fight for it!"

"That's just what we need," Annabeth said with a smirk. "Hey, anyone know where Lou Ellen and Butch and Clovis are?"

The other looked around the ping pong table, seemingly just realizing that members of the council were missing.

Percy shrugged. "Clovis is probably asleep, and I'm guessing the others skipped. Jake is still injured, right?"

"Whatever. It's not like we need any of them here," Drew said lazily, inspecting her perfectly manicured fingernails.

"Hey, Drew," called Pollux. "I heard the nymphs talking about you the other day. They said they were gonna put mud in your bed for all the air pollution your hair stuff produces. Might wanna go check on that."

"What?" she screeched. Before anyone could stop her, she ran out of the room, high heels clacking against the floor.

"Dude, are you serious?" asked Travis, his face lighting up with glee. The son of Dionysus grinned.

"Nope. I just couldn't listen to her for another second."

Even Chiron laughed, though he tried to stifle it.

Suddenly, a bright light appeared in the middle of the table. Everyone jumped away, and Percy drew Riptide anxiously. When the glow faded away, a piece of paper floated down. Annabeth snatched it up and squinted at it.

"It's… it's a game!" she cried incredulously.

"Seriously?" Connor stuck his head out from under the table. "Awesome!"

"No, not awesome. Listen." She began to read the paper aloud.

**The Ultimate Truth or Dare Challenge**

**Rules**

**1. All demigods present must participate on pain of death.**

**2. Players must not intentionally lose a challenge. Any players who attempt to do so will be punished.**

**3. All questions must be answered truthfully and all dares carried out in full. All challenges must be undertaken within ten seconds of annunciation. **

**4. Any player who is unable or unwilling to complete a challenge will be removed from the game immediately.**

**5. Questions and/or dares cannot be altered in any way.**

**6. Players may not sacrifice themselves in favor of other players, nor may they assist other players in their challenges.**

**7. Players may not attempt to incapacitate or kill other players unless a challenge calls for such actions.**

**8. Players may not ask help from any god, goddess, or other immortal being.**

**9. Players will take turns in order of their cabin numbers, and, in the case of multiple demigods from one cabin, birth order.**

**10. The winner of the challenge shall be granted one wish.**

The room was silent when Annabeth finished.

"Well," Chiron sighed. "I'm afraid you cannot refuse a summons like this. You will have to participate."

"This is insane," Katie protested. "What if it's a trap?"

"Katie's right. For all we know, Kronos is behind this somehow," said Nico.

"'All demigods present must participate on pain of death,'" read Percy. "I think Chiron's right. We have to at least give this a shot, or we… die."

Annabeth nodded. "And the eight of us who don't win will be 'removed from the game.' I really hope that doesn't mean the losers get killed, although it's a definite possibility."

"Getting killed would _not_ be good," Nico agreed.

Another glow began to fill the room, this time surrounding each of the demigods. As everything faded away to white, they heard Chiron say, "Good luck, heroes. I hope you all survive."


	3. Will Tries to Fly

**A/N: Salutations! Welcome back to the Truth or Dare Challenge. *stock applause* Today, ... um, yeah, that's getting boring. Anyway, here's part 1 of round 1 - enjoy, review, etc.!**

**For future reference, the order: Percy (cabin 3), Katie (4), Clarisse (5), Annabeth (6), Will (7), Travis (11), Connor (11), Pollux (12), Nico (13).**

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><p><strong>The Ultimate Truth or Dare Challenge<strong>

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><p><strong>Will Tries to Fly<br>**

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><p>The first thing they noticed was the whiteness. The entire room (if it even <em>was<em> a room) was the same obnoxiously bright color of fluorescent lights. Endless white was all they could see, stretching till the limits of their vision.

The second thing they noticed was that there were no windows, no doors, no way to escape. Nico couldn't even shadow-travel them out, without shadows. Whoever had brought them here, they'd considered every possible exit. They were trapped.

The last thing they noticed was a large, white marble table in the center (or rather, what they thought was the center) of the room. Carved in Ancient Greek were the rules of the Challenge.

"Holy Zeus," muttered Pollux.

"I'm just guessing," said Connor, "that there's no food here."

Everyone stared at him.

"What?"

"Anyway…" Katie said, walking towards the table. "I wonder how the game starts."

Annabeth looked down, reading the rules again. "It says that we go in cabin order. So, Percy, you're first, then Katie, Clarisse, me, Will… Travis, aren't you the older one?"

"We never should have told them," Travis muttered to his brother, scowling. "It makes it so much harder to confuse them."

"Travis, Connor, Pollux, and Nico," Annabeth finished.

"I still don't like this," Nico said sullenly.

"Suck it up, wimp," Clarisse growled. "You think any of us like this?"

The son of Hades glared. "Call me a wimp again, and you go to Tartarus."

"Anyway," Percy said loudly, trying to distract the two. "How do we start? Do I just, like, choose truth or dare?"

"I think that's the best way to do it," Annabeth said, nodding.

"Alright. " He paused for a moment, looking thoughtful, and then took a deep breath. "Dare."

Immediately, a bright light similar to the one that had appeared on the ping pong table hovered over the marble. A piece of paper floated down, and he caught it.

_Drink the water_.

"Drink…? Oh."

A glass of murky black liquid had appeared. At the same time, the light formed numbers—10, 9, 8…

Nico gasped. "That's _not_—"

"Yeah, it is," Percy said with a grimace. "Water from the Styx." He glanced up at the light. 4, 3…

He picked up the glass, trying to keep his hand from trembling, and lifted it to his mouth. _Get it over with_, he thought. Just as the numbers reached one, he took a gulp.

The water scalded his throat, burning nearly as much as when he'd bathed in the river. He grit his teeth against the pain, trying not to cry out. His mind went blank for a moment, other than a few choice words that cannot be repeated.

"Uh, Percy?" came Travis's voice. "It might be best if you _didn't_ break the cup." Percy heard a sharp _smack_, and then a resentful "Just saying…"

He opened his eyes (he didn't remember shutting them) and saw that small, spidery cracks were running through the glass—he'd gripped it so tight that it had started to shatter.

"Oh. Ow." His voice came out hoarse and gravelly. He glanced down at the glass and saw that there was still some of the water left, enough for another sip. Grimacing, he drained the rest of the glass and ended up having to grip the marble table for support so that he didn't collapse.

"—cy? Percy, are you alright?" Someone was shaking his shoulder.

He took a deep, shuddering breath and looked up to see Annabeth staring at him worriedly.

"Yeah. Ugh. There's a reason they don't put that stuff in vending machines."

She rolled her eyes and muttered something that sounded like "Seaweed Brain." Percy backed up to where the others were standing, all looking impressed (even Clarisse).

"Well," he said awkwardly. His throat still burned, but it was slowly getting better. "One down, gods know how many more to go."

"And on that cheery note, I choose Truth," said Katie. She stepped forward hesitantly. She'd never been the _let's-go-do-something-dangerous_ type. Not that she was averse to danger and everything—it would have been impossible to fight through the war and not toughen up—but she didn't exactly _like_ risking her life. Who would?

The same bright light interrupted her thoughts, and another piece of paper floated down. She read it aloud.

_What is your pet peeve?_

Katie stared at the slip of paper as the numbers ticked down. She had a lot of pet peeves, and two of them were standing in this room.

"Connor and Travis," she said, smirking. The Stolls looked offended as everyone else laughed. They were about to protest when the light brightened again. Clarisse stepped forward with her typical tough, determined expression.

"Dare."

Just as before, a piece of paper fluttered down from the light. She caught it, crumpling the thin paper, and read the words.

_Speak only in Latin for the rest of the round_.

Her mouth hung open in indignation. How the Hades was she supposed to know freaking _Latin_?

"That's ridiculous," she muttered. Her eyes widened as she realized her mistake. "Styx." The bright light moved down from its position above the table and began to envelop the daughter of Ares, who couldn't move. She was frozen, her hands still clutching the piece of paper.

The others cried out things like "No!" and "Clarisse!" but could only watch in horror as the light surrounded her completely and she vanished.

After a beat of silence, Connor said, "So… that's what happens when we don't answer?" Everyone was still too shocked to reply. "Right. Just checking."

"Well, it's my turn." Annabeth squared her shoulders as she walked up to the marble table. Though she hid it well, her heart was racing. _No mistakes_, she thought. "Dare."

Another slip of paper dropped from the now sinister-looking light.

_Recite __Π__ to the hundredth decimal place_.

She breathed a sigh of relief as the numbers began to tick down. The others grinned; they all knew that she could have probably recited it to the millionth.

"3.14159," she began. It only took her a few minutes to finish. "…70679."

Percy shook his head in amazement as she stepped away looking immensely relieved. "I will never understand how you can hold that many numbers inside your head."

"It's a brain child thing," she said, smirking.

Will laughed nervously and then stepped up to the plate—er, table. He stared at the light as he tried to decide. So far, the only truth hadn't been so bad… but he really didn't feel like spilling his life story. "Dare."

He picked up the slip of paper and read it loud enough so that the others could hear.

_Walk the line_.

"Hey, isn't that the name of a movie?" asked Pollux.

Before anyone could answer, the ground rumbled, and a massive pit appeared in front of them. Strung across it was a single tightrope. The light started to count down: 10, 9…

"Oh, Hades," Will muttered. "You have got to be kidding me."

"Good luck, bro." Travis clapped him on the shoulder before backing away hastily.

5,4…

Will put his right foot on the rope, and it held. Hesitantly, he let his other foot touch, bending his knees to keep his balance. _Take it slow_, he reminded himself. _Now that you're on the rope, there's no need to rush_.

He took a step forward, and then another. He was almost halfway across when an arrow whizzed across his path barely a foot in front of his face.

"Whoa!" he yelled, flailing his arms wildly as he tried to regain his balance.

His foot slipped, and he fell.


	4. Nico Gets New Clothes

**AN: It's been ridiculously long. I don't know _why_ I neglected this for such a long time - it's a nicely therapeutic experience. **Oh, and before I forget... this story won in the Suspense category of the PJO Fandom Awards! *random act of spazzing* Thanks to the hosts for the nomination.** Also, I have a request. Got good truths or dares? Suggest 'em, because I'm going to need the help in the future. Also, to the person who suggested a dare for a certain character and might notice that referenced here... foreshadowing! Anyway. Some minor formatting edits for your viewing pleasure. Enjoy, laugh a little, and review!**

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><p><strong>The Ultimate Truth or Dare Challenge<strong>

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><p><strong>Nico Gets New Clothes<br>**

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><p>"Will!"<p>

"No!"

They scrambled to the edge of the pit just in time to see the same bright flash that had taken Clarisse away. Will was… gone.

"Oh my gods," Katie whispered, a hand clamped over her mouth in disbelief. The others could only stare down at the spot where their friend had been.

"Well," Travis said feebly. "Guess it's my turn now."

"Are we really going to keep doing this?" Pollux asked. He sat down on the pristine white ground and sighed. "We've already lost two people, and we're not even halfway through one round. And only one person can survive."

"Maybe there's some kind of escape clause," Connor said hopefully.

Nico snorted derisively. "Dude, you've been watching too many Disney movies. There's no escaping this."

Annabeth sighed, looking back over at the marble table inscribed with the rules of the Challenge. "Nico's right. The rules cover pretty much every loophole. Whoever made them… well, they pretty much covered all the exits."

"And if you can't find one, gods know none of us will be able to," Percy said. "So we just have to keep going."

As if on cue, the now-familiar bright light reappeared over by the table. After Connor pulled Pollux back to his feet, the group trudged back. They tried not to look back at the gaping chasm Will had fallen into, which meant that they didn't see when it slowly, silently, began knitting itself back together until there was no trace of there ever having been a gaping chasm.

"Travis," his brother said, "your turn, right?"

"I wish we were still young enough to switch places," Travis grumbled. "Then I could make you go twice." Ignoring Connor's indignant shove, he told the magical glowing light that he wanted a dare.

"You're crazy," Pollux said sadly as the slip of paper floated down. Travis took on a look of horror as he read his challenge.

_The player opposite you must give you a wedgie._

"YES!" Nico yelled. He made a fist-pumping motion and made to move towards Travis.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," he protested. "No way! I am _not_—"

"Five seconds," Annabeth warned tensely.

Travis winced. "Not too hard," he told Nico, who just cackled in reply. He grabbed the back of Travis's shorts, and the son of Hermes scrunched his eyes shut before letting out a very high-pitched, un-manly squeal.

"You," he gasped, tucking his boxers back in again, "are so dead."

"Well, it's not like death would be anything new for me…"

"Shut up, Nico. Connor, go."

The younger son of Hermes smirked and, with a shrug, approached the table. "Truth." Seeing everyone else's surprised faces, he explained, "There is no way I'm, like, eating itching powder or something."

"Didn't you guys do that to Clarisse once?" Annabeth asked.

The paper landed in Connor's outstretched hand as Travis muttered, "Yeah, we did. I was sore for weeks."

_Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?_

Connor groaned.

"Whoa," Travis said, looking over his brother's shoulder. "How do they know these things?"

"So… you actually _have_…?" Pollux asked with an amused smirking.

"Yes. Ms. Eldridge. Third grade. Moving on."

"What did she look like, Connor?" asked Katie, batting her eyelashes sarcastically. "Was she _real perrrty_?"

"Oh, not as perty as you, Gardner."

Recognizing the warning signs of another epic Stoll-Gardner clash, Percy fake-coughed and quickly interrupted. "Pollux, you're next, right?" He shot the son of Dionysus an imploring look that clearly read _go before they start World War III_.

"Uh, yeah. I am. Cabin twelve. Right." He paused, considering his options. So far the truths had been pretty embarrassing. On the other hand, he really didn't feel like swallowing water from the Styx or getting a wedgie or (gods forbid) having to sing. "Um, truth?" His decision came out as a question, but the floating light seemed to accept it.

Katie and Connor continued to glare at each other resentfully, but they maintained a tense silence. Pollux took a deep breath as he caught the paper and turned it over slowly in his hand.

_What is your last name?_

The son of Dionysus shook his head in amazement. "They're evil."

"You know," Annabeth said musingly, "you've never told us anything but your first name…"

Pollux glanced anxiously at the numbers twisting in the light. 7, 6…

"It can't be that bad," Percy reassured him.

He closed his eyes. "Sot."

There was a beat of pregnant silence before Travis snickered. "_Sot?_ You can't be serious."

"Um, I hate to put a damper on this," Connor began, "but what's so funny about Sot?"

Annabeth suppressed a laugh. "The word 'sot' means 'drunk,'" she explained. "So you can see how that would be…"

"Ironic?" Pollux suggested glumly. "Yeah. Can we keep going? Nico, I think it's your turn now."

Said son of Hades stepped forward and tried to contain his smirk. He really shouldn't have been laughing—his last name meant _of angels_, after all, and that was about as ironic as surnames could get—but he couldn't help but think that Dionysus had been just plain cruel when he had kids with someone named Sot.

Once Pollux had shrunk back to the clump where everyone else was standing, Nico looked back over his shoulder at their grim faces.

"You realize how weird this is, right?" he asked suddenly. "I mean, we're playing deadly truth or dare."

"For some unknown evil person who's probably laughing at us as we torture ourselves," Percy agreed. "Yeah. Extremely weird. What's new?" Annabeth rolled her eyes, but chose not to comment.

"Just checking," Nico muttered. "Dare." He reached out and grabbed his slip of paper, accidentally crumpling it in his hand.

_Say the words 'in pink leather' after everything you say for the next round._

His mouth hung open like someone had unhinged his jaw for a few moments. Finally he was able to choke out, "If we get out of this, I am going to personally ensure that whoever's doing this gets sent straight to the Fields of Punishment… in pink leather."

"Will you be in pink leather?" Travis asked as everyone else burst out laughing.

Connor grinned. "Or will they?"

Nico gave them his best death glare. "Them. In pink leather. And if you don't stop talking right now, you might be going down there with them, also _in pink leather_."

"There are a lot of ways you could use this to your advantage," Annabeth said, although she was trying to repress a grin.

"Yeah. Tons. In pink leather." He paused for a second and then added, "I don't have to say anything, though, right? I can just stay silent. In pink leather."

"Way to ruin it for the rest of us," Connor said sadly. Nico smirked in reply, keeping his lips shut tight.

"So is that it?" Katie asked. "Everyone's gone already."

"No," Percy said as the despised ball of light reappeared above the table. "It's time for round two."

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><p>"And… <em>pause<em>," Hephaestus muttered, staring at the now frozen demigods on the screen. He grinned, which was not a lovely image, as the _Ultimate Truth or Dare Challenge_ logo flashed and commercials began to play for the second break.

As of yet, his newest project was going perfectly. He'd gotten Chiron (who had been quite shocked and relieved to discover the true nature of the Challenge) to hold a special assembly so that the campers could see their participating friends. And OS63, the automaton in charge of monitoring godly activity, reported that an astounding ninety three percent of gods in the eternal city were watching the show. All twelve Olympians were included in that number (except for Hephaestus's wife Aphrodite, who was, er, otherwise occupied).

"Thingamabob!" Hephaestus roared. "Get me those ratings! And make it quick!"

In precisely eleven point four seconds the harried automaton who processed HephaestusTV's numbers whirred into the room clutching a device that looked like an iPad.

"My lord," Thingamabob began as he handed the device to Hephaestus, "ratings have increased nearly thirty percent in the last five minutes. At this rate, the program should have approximately—"

"Yes, yes, I know how many we'll have by the next break," the god grumbled impatiently. He scrutinized the machine for an instant. "Go get V75T from the focus group on Truth and Dare Formulation. I need more information on that son of Dionysus, and Hades's kid. And when you're done, go get a pick-me-up in Repairs. You're running slower than usual."

"Yes, my lord. Right away." The automaton hurried out of the room and was almost immediately met by V75T.

"When is he going to remember that you go by Thingama_robert_ now?" the other automaton asked.

Thingamarobert shook his head in grudging amusement. "When he cuts that infernal beard."

"So, never."

"Precisely." And Thingamarobert shot off to Repairs, where he hoped to find a nice pint or two of hard motor oil.


	5. Percy Helps Hobos

**AN: Bonjour! Nice to see you all again. Sorry this took so long. I still need truths/dares! Preferably for Percy, Katie, and Travis, although of course truths/dares for any remaining characters will be welcome. Feel free to suggest absolutely ridiculous, there's-no-way-she'll-do-that ones too; they might be used in the next chapter for a certain purpose that you'll learn at the end of this chappie.  
>Sorry about the Twilight* reference. The characters made me do it. (*No vampires were harmed in the making of this chapter, however much Annabeth wanted me to.)<br>*This chapter officially means I've archived over 100,000 words in FanFiction! Bring in the dancing lobsters.*  
>Review, and give me some truthsdares! Pretty pretty please with ambrosia on top.**

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><p><strong>The Ultimate Truth or Dare Challenge<strong>

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><p><strong>Percy Helps Hobos<br>**

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><p>"V75T!"<p>

The automaton's head jerked up at the rather loud sound of Hephaestus's voice. He hurried to the main office, wondering what Hephaestus could want from him. This was the second time he'd been summoned in one short commercial break—was something wrong?

He entered hesitantly, noticing that Hephaestus was hunched tensely over his work bench.

"My lord?" If he wasn't an automaton, he would have stuttered. An angry Hephaestus could be nearly as fatal as diving into one of his forges.

The god spun around in his chair, holding a small touch screen in his hand. From what he could see, V75T thought that it was showing his department's Truth and Dare suggestions. V75T's eyes widened. If that was what had made the god mad…

"What is this?" Hephaestus asked. He shook the tablet at the automaton, and then scrolled through the list with a single finger. "'Have Percy make out with Artemis,' 'Make Travis prank call Zeus'… 'Tell Grover to eat a hamburger'? Grover isn't even _in_ the Challenge!" Hephaestus threw the tablet on the floor, where it broke. He wasn't concerned, though; he could fix it in less than a second. "How do you explain this?"

V75T's bronze hands shook. "The polls revealed that viewers found immensely unreasonable dares to be the most entertaining," he began, "so we—"

A section Hephaestus's beard caught fire. "Who were you polling, twelve year old girls? These are utterly ridiculous. Everyone knows gods think violence is entertaining! Well, other than—"

_Beep!_ A red light flashed above the god's desk.

"Commercial break is ending in sixty seconds," he grunted. He returned his gaze to the trembling automaton. "Go back and get me some _good_ suggestions. We've got enough to go on for the next round, but if there's nothing better by the next break I might have to make some replacements."

V75T's mechanical eyes widened. "Yes, my lord! Of course, Lord Hephaestus, right away." He backed out of the workplace hastily, bowing robotically.

"Sometimes," Hephaestus grumbled as he watched the Challenge logo flash across the main screen, "magic servants don't seem so bad."

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><p>"It's time for round two," Percy said. He blinked and looked around, only to see the others all wearing slightly confused expressions as well.<p>

"Whoa… déjà vu," said Connor, making exaggerated gestures to convey the mystical feeling.

Travis nodded. "Twilight Zone moment."

Nico looked even more confused now. "The thing with the sparkly vampires? What does that have to do with déjà vu? —In pink leather."

"No, Nico." Annabeth tried not to sound too condescending. "The thing with the alternate dimension. Sci-fi TV series… ring a bell?"

Nico shrugged. "Hey, I've only been in this century for, like, a year and a half. I'm still catching up on pop culture. In pink leather."

The Stoll brothers snickered. "Idiots," Katie muttered.

Suddenly, the bright light flashed over the table, like it was reminding them of the task at hand. Percy grimaced. "My turn, right?"

No one bothered to answer.

"Just checking," Percy mumbled. He walked up to the marble table. "Truth… there's no way I'm drinking from the Styx again."

Just as with the first round, the light pulsed slightly and a piece of paper fluttered down into Percy's outstretched hand.

_What was your last dream about?_

"Well that's a weird question," Katie commented.

Percy's eyes flicked up to the countdown. Seven seconds. "Yeah, it is." His brow furrowed as he tried to remember. "Last dream… I think it was the one where I was carrying an old lady across a highway."

Annabeth's internal BS detector bleeped, and her eyebrows rose of their own accord. "Carrying an old lady across the highway."

"Were you on drugs?" Connor asked.

"No, I was not!" he spluttered indignantly. "Besides, it's not _that_— okay, fine, it's weird. Her name was June," he remembered suddenly. "And she looked like a walking dumpster."

Katie let out a dainty snort. "Charming."

"Hey, it's true." Percy held up his hands defensively. "Anyway, isn't it your turn?"

She glowered at him. "Smooth. But yeah, it is." She moved forward. "I choose—"

"Why don't you do a dare, Katie?" Travis suggested innocently.

"It couldn't hurt," Connor added.

"It could hurt very much!" Katie said incredulously. "I'm not going to do what either of you idiots say."

"So then… you'd do the exact opposite of what we suggest?"

"Well duh, Travis. It's not like I trust your judgment. You two think "

"Then why don't you choose truth? It's a _very_ safe option." Travis grinned. "And all you have to do is spill your deepest, darkest secrets… Or you could go the easy way with a dare. The worst that can happen to you is having to sing show tunes or something."

Katie glared at him, reminding everyone of her mother. "Right," she said sarcastically. "I'm going to say 'I choose dare' and completely—"

She gaped at the floating light, which had just flashed and released a small strip of paper. Apparently, it didn't appreciate sarcasm. Travis and Connor high fived.

"I hate you Travis Stoll."

"Well, don't get too warm and fuzzy, Gardner," Travis said. "Maybe you should go see what your dare is."

Katie muttered a suggestion as to where exactly Travis could—

"Language, Katie!" Nico said, smirking. "In pink leather."

She snatched up the paper as the countdown hit two.

_Eat one spoonful._

A bowl of small white pellets had appeared on the table, along with a spoon. She quickly grabbed the spoon, hoping that the action would delay the countdown. The twisting numbers vanished.

Now she took the time to observe what exactly she was supposed to eat.

"Oh gods," she choked out. "That's—that's plant fertilizer!"

"They're making you poison yourself? That's barbaric," Annabeth spat.

Katie gulped. "I know," she said. "But—I have to." She took a deep breath, squeezed her eyes shut, and lifted the trembling spoon to her mouth. _Just one,_ she thought, _and then that's it_.

The fertilizer tasted horrible, like that one time she had accidentally gotten nail polish in her mouth. The chemicals burned her tongue and throat, and swallowing was among the worst things she had ever experienced. After what seemed like an eternity, she managed to choke down the whole spoonful.

"Are you… okay?" Pollux asked hesitantly, looking at her with a concerned expression.

Katie looked up at him and nodded. "Yeah," she croaked. "Just don't make me talk much. Annabeth, go."

Annabeth stepped up and confidently said, "Dare."

No one bothered to tell her she was crazy; they figured she would probably go into a perfectly organized, well thought out lecture on the probability, risks and benefits of choosing a dare over a truth.

She made sure not to crumple the piece of paper as it landed in her hand.

_Remove the clothes of the male closest to you._

She read it aloud with a fierce scowl. "Now that's just insulting."

"You have got to be kidding me," Percy groaned.

Annabeth shrugged. She slid her knife out of its sheath and pointed it straight at the closest guy.

"Connor, strip."

The son of Hermes' eyes bugged out of his head. "What?" he choked.

"You heard me." She smirked. "Unless you want to get to know the business end of this blade…"

"This is definitely cheating." Connor tugged his shirt off resentfully. (Percy tried not to grimace.)

"Not really," Annabeth said, voice perfectly nonchalant. It wasn't hard to imagine her casually cleaning her nails with the knife, except that it was still pointed rather menacingly at Connor. "The dare doesn't say _how_ I'm supposed to remove your clothes. It's up to interpretation. So coercion is absolutely a viable method."

Soon, Connor stood before the remaining six in only his underwear, which (he thanked the gods) he'd changed the night before. The rest of his clothes lay in a pile on the pristine while floor.

Connor crossed his arms. "I'm _not_ taking off my boxers. That brings personal bubble violation to a whole new level."

"Well," Nico began with an amused grimace. "It's not like any of us particularly _wanted_ you to. We could do without the mental scarring."

"Hey! It's not like I'm bad-looking or anything—"

"And besides," Travis interrupted, "People always say twins look the same, and anyone can tell that _I'm_ super sexy."

"We're not twins, you—"

"Language!"

"Katie, shut up!"

A sudden flash of light illuminated the white room, blinding all of them. When it faded, they looked around and blinked rapidly. They quickly realized that one of their number was missing.

"What was that?" Percy asked.

"Nico forgot to say 'in pink leather,' I think," Annabeth explained. She looked somewhat paler than usual.

Pollux appeared stricken. "You mean it can get us even when it's not our turn?"

"No…" Percy said slowly. "It was still his turn, wasn't it? Because his dare was for the whole next round. So it hadn't ended yet."

"That sucks," Travis muttered.

"What I still don't get, though," Connor said, seeming to forget the fact that he was still quite exposed, "is where you go when it gets you. I mean, they wouldn't… kill us, right?"

"But," Annabeth reminded them, "we still don't know who 'they' is. It could very well be someone who wants us dead."

"Yeah," Travis countered. "But it could also be some god just trying to get a laugh, right? Wouldn't be the first time."

The light flashed again and Connor yelped, though he tried to pass it off as a sneeze.

"Travis, let's just move on to your turn," Pollux said. "Arguing about whether or not we're going to die will not help. We still have to do the challenges."

"Pollux is right." Annabeth sheathed her knife and told Connor to put his clothes back on. He gladly obeyed.

"Go already, would you?" Katie huffed while glaring at Travis.

"No need to be so pushy," he muttered resentfully. He had no idea why the Aphrodite cabin kept squealing about the two of them being 'the next Percy and Annabeth'. He had no intention of ever being with such an uptight, bossy, controlling… (Funnily enough, Katie was having strikingly similar thoughts at that same moment.) "Dare."

The floating light pulsed, and yet another slip of paper fell into his hand.

* * *

><p>Hephaestus sighed and clicked pause, allowing himself a slight chuckle at the way the demigods all froze onscreen. It was almost like they were automatons, being controlled by a single button.<p>

A speaker buzzed on the console, and a moment later a tinny, robotic voice came through. "Lord Hephaestus, you have a visitor."

He grumbled something about organic beings and held down the 'speak' button. "Who is it, KB2424?"

The automaton suddenly sounded quite flustered, for a machine. "Your wife, my lord. Lady Aphrodite."

To god raised his smoldering eyebrows. It wasn't every day his wife sought him out; she was usually off meddling in other peoples' love lives and having affairs. In fact, the last time he'd talked to her was… a week ago? He lost track of time when he was working on new projects.

He told KB2424 to let her in. Maybe _she_ would have some good ideas for challenges, although they'd probably be all about kissing and confessions of undying love and all that sappy stuff. Still, it would be better than what his team was coming up with. "Prank calling Zeus..." he muttered to himself. "Bah!"

Suddenly, he felt small, smooth hands massaging his shoulders. "Having issues, darling?"

He started and spun his chair around to see Aphrodite simpering at him. It took him a few moments to respond; even he wasn't immune to her charms.

"Automatons," he said finally, "are not good with creativity."

"Ohh," Aphrodite said. She smiled. "So you need truths? And dares?"

"Yep."

"Well…" His wife glided over to a workbench and daintily picked up a heavy, jeweled necklace. "I could help you with that. I recently got into a little tiff with Athena—she just won't get together with Poseidon, even though I've _told_ her it would work because there's so much passion there—where was I? Oh, and I thought I'd, ah, show her how great love could be, so to speak."

Hephaestus gave her a look that clearly said: _I'm not following._

"_So_," she continued. "I have a dare—or a truth, actually, that you could use for her daughter Annabeth." She leaned down and whispered something in his ear. A slow (rather hideous) smile spread across Hephaestus's face.

"You really think…?"

Aphrodite rolled her eyes. "Honey, I'm the love goddess. I really _know_. Your viewers will love the romance. And it was such a romantic… well, you of all people should know, you practically made it happen." She toyed with a bracelet as she spoke, slipping it on and off her delicate wrist.

Hephaestus glanced over at her in utter confusion. "What? When did I ever make—?"

"Oh, _you know_." She sighed in exasperation. "Honestly, Hephaestus, you would be completely romantically lost if not for me. I don't know how you can surround yourself with these _machines_—" She said the word with distaste, gesturing vaguely to the door.

"Aphrodite, we've gone over this trillions of times." He was beginning to get quite annoyed with his wife. A section of his beard caught fire. "I don't _do_ people. They're too complicated, they break too easily—"

"Fine, fine!" The goddess flapped her manicured hands, somehow managing to make the awkward motion attractive. "I give up."

"For now," he grumbled. He glanced up at the screen. "The show's starting again in two minutes, and I can't have anyone in the control room."

Aphrodite took the not-so-subtle hint and sashayed over to the doors. "And make sure you use my challenge!" she sang over her shoulder.

As she left, he pressed a button and buzzed V75T. "Get down to Camp Half-Blood. Conduct a poll and see what the demigods have to say. Oh, and ask for suggestions."

"Yes, my lord," came V75T's anxious voice over the intercom. "Right away." He sped off to the elevator.

_Camp Half-Blood, here we come_, he thought.


	6. Bananas, Bots, and Bacchic Baboons

**AN: Long wait, short chapter. I'm just cruel that way. Sorry. The next one will be a shorter wait and a longer chapter, I promise! **

* * *

><p><strong>The Ultimate Truth or Dare Challenge<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Bananas, Bots, and Bacchic Baboons<strong>

* * *

><p>All the campers groaned as their friends froze and the now-familiar <em>The Ultimate Truth or Dare Challenge<em> logo spun across the screen. A commercial for Hebe's Anti-Aging Cream ("Take away millennia in just ten minutes!") began to play.

"What?" Lee, a son of Hermes, yelled. "No! They can't—"

"Dude," an Apollo camper said from next to him, "It's called a cliffhanger. It's what networks do when they want people like you to be all, 'Oh no! I need to keep watching to find out what happens or I'm going to die of anxiety!'"

"Austin, I _know_ that." Lee rolled his eyes impatiently. "But I want to know what happens, since he's my brother and all—"

"And since you want new prank ideas," Will Solace put in.

"That's not true at all—"

Suddenly, a flash of white drew everyone's attention to the front of the amphitheater, right next to the enormous screen set up especially for watching their cabinmates on HephaestusTV.

"Whoa!" Nico cried, stumbling as he appeared as if someone had pushed him from behind. All twenty cabins immediately burst into raucous applause and cheers, and the son of Hades blinked up at everyone looking quite shocked.

Will sauntered up to the stage and gave Nico an enthusiastic clap on the back. "Took you long enough," he said. "I definitely didn't take that long getting back."

Nico blinked. "You're alive? But we thought—"

"Yeah, I know," Will said easily. "Turns out it's all just a HephaestusTV special, not anyone trying to kill us. Kinda anticlimactic, right?"

Before Nico could reply, Clarisse trudged over. "I gotta say, kid, I thought you'd last longer. I mean, only two rounds? That's pathetic."

Will rolled his eyes. "Yeah, look who's talking."

"The girl who could beat you to death," Clarisse countered menacingly. "_That's_ who's talking."

"I prefer not to get beaten to death. But thanks for the offer."

"It's always standing, punk."

"Um, sorry to interrupt your banter and stuff," Nico said, "but we're, like, alive."

Will stared at him. "And…?"

"And everyone was watching us."

"Yeah. Chiron let everyone take the day off from—"

"And everyone still playing," Nico continued adamantly, "thinks they die if they get out."

Clarisse rolled her eyes. "Well duh. Anything else to add, Captain Obvious?"

"Well if you want I can add an army of the dead to this conversation. Your choice."

The daughter of Ares probably would have tackled him right then and there if another burst of light hadn't drawn everyone's attention to center stage again. A fresh ripple of murmuring broke out among the campers, who had already been talking animatedly about the events of the last part of the show.

When the light faded, a group of rather nervous-looking automatons stood in a loose clump in the center of the amphitheater.

V75T, whose bronze legs were trembling slightly (not that the automaton would ever admit it), stepped forward. "Hello," he began. "We come from HephaestusTV, and we're here to conduct a quick survey."

The campers responded with only more muttering and the occasional inquisitive glance, so V75T continued. "So, if you don't mind, we'd like to hear your suggestions for challenges for—"

The rest of his speech (which he'd meticulously prepared on the way down from Olympus) was drowned out by a burst of noise from the campers, particularly the loud collective squeal from the Aphrodite cabin. Immediately, people were tripping over their words in excitement and shouting over each other:

"Wear a crazy hat!"

"Dress up as a banana and—"

"Anyone heard of A Very Potter—?"

"Make them try to—"

"—Travis and Katie—"

"—sneeze—"

"Stop, stop!" V75T blared through a megaphone that had previously been his hand. A flashing red light appeared above his head ("Only 200-watt," Jake Mason whispered to one of his brothers, "I'm surprised Dad hasn't upgraded him yet."), and eventually everyone stopped talking enough that he could continue. "We will come around to _each row_ and ask for suggestions individually. Please keep in mind that we must complete the survey by end of the commercial break, so—"

Another wave of babble broke out, and V75T heaved the automaton equivalent of a sigh and motioned for his fellow automatons to start getting suggestions. Honestly, he thought, demigods were rather primitive inventions compared to automatons. Although the Hephaestus cabin didn't seem _quite_ as horrible…

He decided to question them because they would surely be much more creative and intelligent than any of the others, and promptly headed over to their area of the amphitheater as a commercial for Helios' new tanning salon in New Jersey blared from the screen.

His results weren't as good as he'd hoped.

By the end of the allotted two minutes, V75T's list looked something like this:

Who would you most like to kiss in this room? _(Potential to cause inter-Olympian war. Advise Lord Hephaestus to disregard.)  
><em>Imitate another player and have people to guess.  
>Reassemble— <em>(No – no Hephaestus children left; the others would fail.)<em>  
>Wear some crazy hat that can pop out of nowhere. <em>(Must figure out way to do this.)<br>_Eat a live fish. _(No - Lord Poseidon would be angry.)  
><em>First impressions of everyone in the room.  
>Talk in a Brooklyn accent for the rest of the round.<br>Wear a bag over your head for the next two rounds. _(Strange. Common demigod tradition?)_  
>Build a car engine in one minute.<p>

As he sighed (as much as an automaton _can _sigh, that is) and thanked the Hephaestus cabin, he wondered how angry Lord Hephaestus would be when he saw the lists. Hopefully not furious enough to vaporize anyone, or (gods forbid) recalibrate their systems.

None of the other automatons had had much luck either. HG74, who had been assigned to the Athena cabin, reported back with several complex equations to be solved in a certain amount of time. The children of Aphrodite had given Bot5 heaps of requests for kissing, confessions, and something called 'Tratie,' a term for which none of the automatons could find a meaning. Apollo's kids had given their suggestions in the form of haikus, which made them nearly unintelligible. V75T's personal favorite was one about drunken monkeys, but Hestia would be all over the network, saying that it was inappropriate.

V75T shook his head. There were a few quality suggestions, at least. Might as well send them to Hephaestus. He compiled the list and hit 'Send' just as the logo appeared on the screen again.


End file.
